Finding joy wherever you are
Level up your joy
I’ve been thinking about joy this week. About all the different types of things that bring me joy. Hearing, seeing and feeling a live performance of Mozart’s requiem. Walking barefoot at the beach and kicking up water even though it’s cold. A job well done.
I realised that my definition of joy isn’t necessarily as extreme or with as much exultation of spirit as the American Psychologist’s Association’s definition of joy, but at least it is on the positive side of things.
The intensity of joy is different for different people because we all have different baselines. Some people seem optimistic all the time, others sad. Of course, their expression of joy would not be the same.
On the one side of the spectrum would be the smile, amusement or laugh we get even though we’re sad. On the other side would be the exuberant high-energy kind of happiness with the telltale signs of skipping, belly-laughs and jumping up and down.
The interesting thing about joy is that you can find it anywhere depending on what has meaning for you. Here are some tips of where you could look to find more joy:
Find joy – Level 1
Give yourself time – this could be time to meditate or just to breathe (by not overfilling your calendar with things to do).
Have your own back – be on your own side: if you need time alone, take it. Do not bypass your own needs to please other people.
Choose what you focus on – limit negative and upsetting news and beware of the stories you tell yourself.
Krista O’Reilly-Davi-Digui writes and talks about making space for joy while you’re in pain or in grief. Her website is filled with helpful resources.
Find joy – Level 2
Jump for joy – Jumping is one of the greatest movements that the body has for building and expressing optimism. Stretch out your arms to the sky while you’re at it. [Twyla Tharp in Keep it moving]
Exercise in a group – When you exercise with other people you get the boost of collective joy. [Kelly McGonigal in The joy of movement]
Put on some music – Our brains seem to be hardwired to move when we hear music. Put on some loud music with a beat and move.
Tackle a drawer or cupboard – The KonMarie tidying method works on the principle that you identify what you want to keep in your cupboard/house/life based on what sparks joy within you. As you repeat this selection process you increase your sensitivity to joy. [Marie Kondo in Spark joy]
Find joy – Level 3
Slow down – Becoming aware and being mindful of things that bring us joy require us to slow down. We can’t smell the roses if we’re going 120 km per hour.
Do a joy inventory – Think about the people, places, objects and activities that bring you joy. What about them is joyful?
Add splashes of that expression of joy to your own environment – Say you have a joyful aunt with funky hair and oversized purple-rimmed glasses. Maybe getting a purple vase for your flowers or painting the bathroom door purple would add a splash of joy to your home that would lift your spirits every time you see it.
Designer Ingrid Fetell Lee has some cool ideas of how to add more joy to your life on her website.
Joy isn’t just in the big events and once-in-a-lifetime experiences. They’re in the everyday details and evolve as we pay attention.
Did you notice what made you happy today?